Memories

Memories....hard to forget, hard to remember. 

Today I had a memory from my past relationship.  It was a funny one, wasn't to funny at the time, but looking back its funny as hell. I wanted so badly to write my ex and say, remember when.....sad part is, I don't think he would respond. Not sure I want him to. I miss those days sometimes. I wonder if he thinks about it. If he misses me to. I dont know.

Anyway, I had to express myself somewhere so here I am blogging. Do you ever truly get over someone? The last few days he has really been on my mind. Does that mean I've been on his? We have both moved on. I have someone new. So does he. Is he happy? I don't know.

I do adore my new sweetie. Just unsure of his intentions. It seems to easy.  Anyway, I'm babbling.  I'm out!

Here's to memories you must stifle and painfully keep to yourself ....

Grown boys (trust me, not men)

Huuuuuuge pet peeve. Actually beyond a pet peeve. I despise it! A grown ass man that acts like a kid.

Everyone knows one. Whether its your girlfriend who's dating one, your friend, a family member, we all know at least one!  It has got to be the most unattractive thing to me.

I am fortunate enough to not have any family members like that, but I know a few through other people.

Being a man is about having respect for yourself as well as others. Taking responsibility for yourself. Not blaming others for your shortcomings. You know, some of the same basics that make a woman a true woman. Its about BEING responsible.  No one is perfect, however there must be signs of genuine effort.

When I am single, and seeking out a better half, there are several requirements. Its kinda strange however because even though I have certain requirements, these things just automatically come with the type of men I associate with.  Basically saying, I don't have to put much effort into finding it.  These things are a job, car, place of their own or with a roommate (no baby mommas or girl living there).  Those are very basic. I'm about to be 33. I don't see any reason a man In my age range should have any less.

If you settle for less in a man, you end up with a damn kid! who wants that?  You end up with extra stress, headaches,  and heartache. Love is hard enough without that bullshit. Am I right? Yes!

Bottom line is, women need to have more respect for themselves and their needs. Myself included, just not in this particular area. No sweetie,  your not driving my car, I'm not your fool baby. Grow the hell up and get a car! Job! whatever the case may be.

We as woman are expected to be independent,  strong, perfect ladies, cooks, sex goddesses and not waiver. All for who again? For a man who can't hold down a job or have shit for himself? So, again, balance! Know your worth!

Ladies, be that independent woman yes. Do your thing. Make sure you have someone bringing the same things to the table!

Love...fall in or tip toe?

Ok, big question on my mind....Is it best to just fall in love or better to move sloooowwwwllllyyyyy....

You hear of these amazing relationships that almost start as love at first sight. They sound amazing! Both parties seem equally interested, crazy about each other! It makes me wonder...

It has been years since I have felt that equal connection with someone. With my ex, I had it to a point but you could always feel a sense of holding back between the two of us. I want that crazy, uninhibited, anywhere type of love. No awkwardness. 

On the other hand, is that smart? Is that safe to want or do? I'm not so sure. How do you know when its safe to just dive right in and throw caution to the wind? My opinion, you don't!

Love is a risk no matter who you are or who you choose to be with.  You, are the only person who can decide for yourself if it is worth the risk, or not. 

I have to fight the urge to just let myself go and follow only my heart.  I now feel that its more then important,  but essential,  to weigh out everything. In doing so their also has to be an equal amount of free falling. You cannot let yourself be completely taken in by the emotion and excitement,  you MUST use your brain.

In saying all of this, i still have questions. To be continued ......